2017 was an important year for me because I had my first ever orgasm with a partner during penetrative sex.* This brings my grand total of partners I’ve had orgasms with up to two. That’s right – despite being sexually active for a number of years (with more than two partners, and not only men), I would rarely orgasm during partnered sex. The majority of those times, though, my partner would.
I thought it was normal, and a Durex Global Sex Survey confirms that I’m not the only one. Two thirds of women report that they don’t orgasm every time they have sex, but claim they’re still satisfied. Most of these women also think that it’s important for their partner to orgasm. And it’s no wonder – we live in a phallocentric world, and this phallocentricity translates to sex. Sex ed and mainstream porn and media teach that us that sex ends when a penis goes sploosh, but Durex wants to change that. With their Intense Orgasmic line of products, Durex places more focus on orgasms for both parties during sex, especially for women and people with vaginas. I had the chance to try the line out and I can confirm, life is better with more orgasms.
Durex Intense Orgasmic Stimulating Gel // This baby is the product I was both most excited and apprehensive about. It’s a topical gel that, when applied to the clitoris, stimulates it and intensifies “her” satisfaction.
My biggest challenge with this line/campaign and in writing about the products is that the marketing and packaging is super cisnormative and heteronormative. Not everyone who uses “she/her” pronouns has a vagina, not everyone who has a vagina is a woman, not everyone who has a vagina has sex with people who have penises…the list goes on. I wish Durex had been more inclusive in that respect.
In any case, if you have a clitoris, this product is designed with you in mind. The promised effects of the product are a little vague: it promises a warming, cooling, or tingling sensation. I assume it’s a your-mileage-may-vary situation. For me, it was an icy tingling reminiscent of that one time I accidentally bought a plumping lip gloss…in the best way possible. Plumping lip gloss works by increasing blood flow to your lips. This does the same thing to the clitoris, with the added bonus of more blood flow equaling more sensation.
My only complaint about this product – aside from trans-exclusionary marketing – is that it contains glycerin. Glycerin is a sugar alcohol often found in lots of popular lubricants, especially flavoured ones. Because it’s a sugar, yeast already present in the vagina can feed on it and grow out of balance, causing a yeast infection. I learned this the hard way, and so usually stick to glycerin-free lubes like Sliquid H20. Still, even with using the Stimulating Gel, I haven’t had any issues. Fingers crossed it stays that way.
Durex Intense Orgasmic Condoms // These condoms are both textured and have a stimulating gel on them. When choosing condoms I normally prefer the plain smooth ones, because in previous experiences, I’ve found textured condoms feel kind of like having sex with a cheese grater. In short, I was skeptical. But, in the name of science, I gave these a shot.
I don’t know what kind of magic Durex worked with these, but I. Am. Into. Them.
Durex Intense Sensual Stimulation Vibrating Bullet // Finally, the underdog of the bunch. I was most skeptical of this vibrator. I’ve tried bullet vibes in the past. They win points for the fact that their size and shape make them convenient to use during p-in-v sex, but I prefer a powerful, rumbly vibe if I have my way, and bullets don’t tend to fit the bill.
This little purple friend is loud, buzzy, and surprisingly powerful. The shape fits my body perfectly, and I imagine it’d work well for other plus-size people with vaginas. It’s an excellent size and shape for added clitoral stimulation during sex, which many folks with vaginas appreciate in helping them reach orgasm. Bonus points? Boyfriend liked it too. 😉
Overall, I think this is a great little range for helping all people reach orgasm, and I think that a campaign that focuses on more pleasure for women and people with vaginas is pretty wonderful, too.
* In 2016, I had my first ever orgasm in the presence of another human being ever.